SUBSCRIBE VIA RSSUpdate: All of your comments are kickin’ my arse in a good way. You all are too awesome. Now, please understand that I’m not standing on a ledge somewhere. Nor do I have any inclination of quitting. This is really just a hearty vent to clear my head of frustration. I already feel better and your words are psyching me up. Thank you!
I’ve come to the realization that this blog will probably never become what I initially hoped it would be.
I suppose I’m okay with that but I can’t pretend I’m not disappointed. Without traction I’m sure there will come a day when the hours I spend without reward will whittle my motivation to where I no longer find pleasure chasing the carrot. For now, I’m keeping my eye on the prize and remaining hopeful that my visibility increases.
Speaking metaphorically, I think the only reason people notice me is because I’m essentially standing in The Bloggess’ front yard. Nearly all of my web traffic originates from her site. If she were to quit blogging in order to open a metal rooster store, few would even know I’m alive.
What I hoped to achieve through blogging was an influx of offers to write. Whether it be through online portals, print publications, a recurring column, or my ultimate goal and dream, a book.
I love to write but that alone doesn’t make me a “writer” in the way I want to be remembered. I think I’m good at it, I’m told I’m good at it, but either I’ve overestimated my talent or others have underestimated my potential.
Always the optimist I considered that perhaps the world ignores me because they just can’t find me. To counter this, I started writing passionately every single day hoping that, through laughter, people would be compelled to share my site with their friends. And then their friends would share with their friends, and so on. Kind of like Amway but without the meetings and detergent. Eventually, one of these friends would recommend it to a friend who had an “in” with The Stir. They’d fall in love with my style and follow up with a plea to join their team. From there, the snowball would grow until I’m climbing the charts at Amazon.
Like I said, always the optimist.
People have tried to push me into doing contests, product reviews, ambassador programs, and sponsored posts in order to get my name out, but I have no interest in doing that. I feel that if my talent isn’t enough to get people to take notice and visit more often, then slinging products, launching giveaways, or writing flowery paid posts isn’t going to do it either. The visitors won’t be there for me, they’ll be there for the potential freebies.
To rectify the lack of visibility, I decided to write down all the reasons why I’ll never be famous and then attack the list one issue at a time. It was a noble concept, but the more I reviewed my list, the more I realized that addressing these issues would require me to compromise who I am and what I’m comfortable doing. Even if fame were on the horizon, it’s just not something I’m willing to do.
Without visibility there can be no discovery. Without discovery there can be no growth. And without growth, fame will always sidestep me.
1. I Don’t Make “Top” Lists
Every time I see a Top 10, Top 25, Top 50, or Top 100 list featuring the “__(insert feel-good adjective here)__ Dad Bloggers”, I am predictably missing. I realize my blog isn’t really conducive to making these lists considering I don’t dole out parenting advice or product reviews, but I had at least hoped to crack a Humor list somewhere.
Granted, many of these lists are published as link bait, but I’m still curious to know what metrics are used to comprise them. I’m not bitter and certainly not taking anything away from those featured, but I’d just like to know where I should sit in order to get noticed.
Do they base it on a ‘dad bloggers’ Google search? If so, I’ll get crackin’ on SEO.
Do they base it on Klout? If so, I’ll rampage on Twitter and Facebook, and even start a LinkedIn account.
Do they base it on other people’s lists? If so, I’m screwed.
Or do they base it on the culmination of weeks of active reading, engaging, and interacting with dozens of different blogs to determine who best personifies their adjective of choice? Is it their opinion or the regurgitated opinion of others? Either way, I’m invisible.
2. I Don’t Do Product Reviews
My blog is a humor blog. Nothing more. If I ever pimp a product, it’s because I genuinely loved it and felt compelled to write about it. Not because a representative shipped me some samples in exchange.
Personally, I don’t know how all the review bloggers do it. The hours are grueling, the work is substantial, and the expectations are high. Even if working with brands was something I wanted to do, I’m certain it’s something I couldn’t do.
Because I don’t branch out beyond personal posts, there’s really no other reason for people to visit my blog. There aren’t deals to be had, freebies to obtain, or prizes to win if you spam the bajeebers out of your Twitter and Facebook streams. When you visit TellingDad.com, you’re coming for the humor. My site is one dimensional by design and I think it’s that very focus that impedes my growth.
3. I’m Not Controversial
I don’t write the kind of “shock and awe” posts that get people all riled up. While I’ve been told behind closed doors that ‘hot button’ posts are a great way to gain notoriety, I don’t want to exploit controversial topics or fuel impassioned arguments just to experience a deluge of traffic.
If people bombard my site, I want the inspiration to be rooted in enjoyment, not angst. Gaining one visitor by way of laughter is worth more to me than gaining a hundred because I inflamed a volatile topic. I get a total high when people tell me I made them laugh and THAT is what drives me to continue. In my case, the quest for that reaction is eternal.
4. I’m Nowhere Else
Many popular bloggers branch out beyond their own URL by writing for a number of different publications and online sites. This provides several conduits through which new visitors and fans can find them. My reach is only so far, and without Jenny, dozens of you wouldn’t have any clue I exist.
And yet, many of you take the time to tell me how much you love my blog. Something that wouldn’t have happened without that initial introduction. I need more of those. More introductions. For I can’t help but feel that if more and more people were introduced to my blog, more and more people would ultimately share the same sentiment.
I was encouraged by others to write to Babble, The Stir, and a few other destinations to inquire about writing for them, as I was told I’d be a “perfect fit.” I did so, and while I was thrilled that I didn’t receive a rejection, I was dismayed when I didn’t receive anything at all. Ever. I wrote three separate times over the course of a month before calling it quits out of fear for annoying them. I wasn’t even a blip on their radar.
5. I Can’t Be Succinct
People seem to love short posts yet I find it difficult to write them. I fear that if I don’t deliver substance, people will feel I took the easy way out…that I’m lazy. That I’m losing my touch. Sometimes I just want to write a short paragraph and attach a photo of something I found funny, but I talk myself out of it.
It drives Heather nuts. She tells me, “This will totally make people smile,” but that’s just not good enough for me. I want laughter. I want tears. I want to be a mood-altering literary substance.
Because I have some neurotic aversion to writing quickies, much like this droning marathon you’re bravely fighting your way through right now, I spend far too much time obsessing over delivering the perfect post. The result? Fewer posts, less free time, and a faster depletion of my creative midnight oil. Still, being verbose is a hard habit to break. Especially when the alternative is frightening to me.
In Closing
I’ll bet you never thought you’d get to this point, right?
Re-reading this diatribe, I totally apologize for the lack of funny. But I had to get this out. Sometimes it’s healthy to write these brain-purging manifestos. I’ll probably regret posting this in the morning, and I can’t promise it’ll stay up for long, but it just won’t be cathartic if I don’t at least click the Publish button.
Believe me, this isn’t some pity post in search of validation. I just needed to vent. Deep down I find it hard to believe that I’ve reached the pinnacle of my ascent. Even so, it’s difficult to envision reaching a higher plateau when I fear I lack the traction to climb.
Thank you for enduring. This felt good. We’ll return to the regularly scheduled nonsense tomorrow.
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For the same reasons you may never be “famous” keeps me reading every day….. okay, close to every day, but I do in fact have a life so like twice in August I didn’t read. Thanks for blogging about your stuff.
Twice in August? No wonder my stats plummeted.
Hazaa! You’re famous in my book! Also, don’t ever quit blogging, because all of THREE people have found my blog through yours! Which is EPIC! Thanks for the help! Keep’em coming!
Oh, I doubt I’ll ever quit blogging. Perhaps it was insinuated above but I like writing too much.
c:
I like how your posts always have substance to them! It makes it a little more worthwhile, to me at least, to come on and have a couple paragraphs to read each post. Even though the quick paragraphs with pictures can be funny, they just kind of make me feel like, ‘That was it?’ Maybe you should make a folder of things like that, and then when you have a substantial amount you can post them all in one post, then you can share the little things you found funny but it wouldn’t be a short-quick post (Or at least it would feel like less of one).
I don’t know anything about blogging so I guess I don’t really have anything else to say other than I love your blog and even though you aren’t super famous like you want to be yet, you’re still great and you bring laughter to people all over!
And clearly, I don’t know how to be succinct either LOL.
I love the idea of storing all the quickie posts in a folder and then just combining them all into a “Too long for Twitter, too short for my blog” kind of post.
You may not “know anything about blogging” but that’s a stroke of genius.
I try c: Hahaha.
Be patient. If you can keep doing this, success will find you. You are hilarious, and that won’t go unnoticed long.
I love your blog for the humor as well as the love for your family that quietly permeates each update. But I do really appreciate the frequency. Since I discovered you, (through Jenny) I have known that every day I am going to get a good laugh. It seems like such a gift; I used to have to wait a week for the Sunday paper to read Dave Barry. (I do get that he got paid to do that however.)
I hope you can keep this up, and I wish you success.
Oh, I can keep it up, as our children, pets, and purchases leave no shortage of topics.
I completely agree with Amy …every single sentence! Keep going and do it on your own terms. “Build it and they will come”….
What would Dave Barry do? WRITE, WRITE, WRITE…you and your silliness are much loved and looked forward to. I am behind in reading, but I’ve done that on purpose. I am a chain reader and when I’m out of stuff to read, I feel lost. I started out reading your blog and gobbled everything up all at once and was left thinking….now what? I have found myself with too much stuff to do at the moment…making baby presents, birthday presents, throwing my mom a surprise 75th bday party, trying to start my own blog (once I figure it out…lol), but thoroughly enjoy reading your stuff. You can make me laugh until I can’t breathe and make me cry all at the same time. You once told me you wish you had a prize for me because I read and commented on almost everything…you DO have a prize….it’s whatever you write next!!!
Greg, I’m going to send validations your way anyway. I already told you I found you through Jenny (who I found via the viral Beyonce post that hit my facebook feed) but you made my short list after scanning through all the blogs she has highlighted on her page. I like your page because you’re real. I relate to your quirkiness (or should I say, to Heather because of my husband’s quirks) and I love that you have substance in your posts. THAT’s what makes me happy. Quite honestly, I’m a little bummed when they’re over.
Now, off to publicize you on my facebook. I think the Pink Floyd post will gain you a few more followers. I’ve been selfishly keeping you as mine. I guess I’ll share.
Lots of aloha to you!
I will say that I did find you through the bloggess’ site but I stayed because of you. I am now addicted to your blog! Everyday I check to see of you have a new post and so far you haven’t failed me. You have left me laughing out loud that my Husband sometimes questions my sanity but then he joins in once he reads. Your amazing and make me smile daily. You make me Want to start a blog but alas sadly I can’t write. But keep up the amazing laughs for years to come
Greg, don’t ever give up on your dream. You are on the *brink*. I know that alot of your visitors, including myself, found you through thebloggess, as has been attested here already, but once you’re found, they stay. Not everyone can say that. Me, I’m like an addict here.. I enjoy reading you & Jenny so much, I refresh my page several times a day to see if I missed anything, reading comments, and waiting with baited breath for more. I don’t think that I’ve really shared you outside of my family, but I will be more diligent when I see the new stuff, to hit that “share on facebook”.
Also, it wasn’t until I read your blog, that I felt compelled to create my own. Truth. My first post is about you & Jenny. I have 3 whole entries. No followers, no comments, but I see there has been a few (3 or 4) visits, from people that visit you, and Eric that I picked up on from here as well at opticynicism. Just the idea that someone actually looked at it, surprises me, because I’m not funny or interesting really. Still, it was neat to think someone saw it. You, are amazing, talented, funny, thoughtful, inspiring.. don’t ever give up on your dream.
meg´s last post…Dream bigger.. at Home Depot.
I love being on the brink of a breakthrough. Usually I’m just on the brink of a freakout. Awesome about starting a blog! Keep it up! I’ll be sure to comment…right now!
Yep, found you through Bloggess, and found Bloggess through Wil Wheaton. Now we need to get Wil Wheaton to find you and you’ll be out there. Please keep writing! I only have time to read a few blogs and yours is now at the top. It takes time, and you already are lucky enough to already have a strong connection through Jenny. I so appreciate your writing style and reading your blog is a great way to start my day.
Don’t give up! I’ve only just begun reading your blog, (like seriously, two days ago) but I’m really into it already! I did get the link from thebloggess, I’ll let my friends know about you… unfortunately I know nobody that knows anybody with an “in”… but… hey.. at least a few people in Australia will know who you are
I love the fact that your funny without swearing! Oh and I know the bicycle in the loungeroom incident is over, but I would totally side with your wife.. sorry mate 
Limited readership has it’s benefits, depending on who your new readers are. For a while I was getting hit by the national nuclear labs every day because I’d written some stuff of interest related to how weapons were actually constructed and I got to have conversations nice people from Homeland Security…on the upside, although that was tense, when it was all over I’d done no wrong and they gave me a really spiffy leatherette planner with a waving American flag and “One Team, One Fight” on it (with matching legal pad and pen) but they said even if I didn’t break the law, they weren’t really keen on the web page related to particle physics in one of it’s more dynamic forms, so I took it down. So, anyway, accidentally getting a lot of readers isn’t always desirable. But if you want to get ~50 hits a day just from various government and military web monitoring people, I could provide you with content and they might give you a spiffy US flag gift eventually.
Is it bad that your comment makes me want to attemp to write something that will get me on some “LIST” at Homeland Security? I enjoy Telling Dad and enjoy that it’s humor I can read at work and not get fired! I’ve been sending your link to EVERYONE – so like 5 people I know.
Oh Verity you just beat me to it – I wanted to reassure Greg that his blog is read world wide – even from waaaay over here in Australia. It is a charming blog, wonderfully down to earth and it always gives me a giggle.
These sort of blogs help bring the world together *cue soppy music in background* we all have the same things that happen to us, you just manage to put a great spin on it and make us all smile (or end up with tears running down our face – firetrucks, toilets, bikes in loungeroom – seriously, what were you thinking??!!)
I read only three blogs, this one, The Bloggess (yes I did find you through there) and an awesome Perth blogger Karen Cheng. But I love them all
Keep up the enjoyable writing Greg, at the very least you can say you are internationally read!
Sorry Anna
but hey, more the merrier!
I found you from MomDot a while back. Every time I read you I crack up, and I love reading your posts. Sometimes I’d get all busy and not get to check if you had a new post up for me to read, I rectified that over the weekend by subscribing by email.
Don’t jump on the bandwagon.
Don’t succumb to peer pressure.
Keep it fresh and real.
That’s why I love your writing style!
And besides, how many other bloggers are the PROUD OWNERS OF FIRE TRUCKS? HMM?
That’s what I thought…
You rock.
It will never become a commercialized blog. I can’t promise than an occasional ad won’t peek in someday to help offset the expense but I will never become a review blog. It’ll always remain fresh, real, and 100% me.
One word…..Agent!
I visited because of Jenny…I stayed because you’re funny. And real. Thank you for that.
Agreed…I was another one that came over from her blog, and now I have RSS feeds for both of you. I check the feeds daily and when something new comes up, I read, I’ve even been known to comment. As a dad, your blog hits home for me as you talk about relationships and life in general.
I read The Bloggess purely for humor, I read yours because it’s funny and I relate to it.
Keep it up!
I totally agree with you on your “no endorsement” philosophy. I started my blog recently just for family, all of whom are in Tennessee, and friends to see what’s going on with my house. There are occasional mentions of products I feel are worthy of passing along just because of their quality, not out of being paid to endorse them. It’ll never make me famous, but that’s okay. I’m just writing because I love to do so.
Fairly recent reader, first time commenter.
I found your blog by randomly looking through some blogs at work when things were slow. I wanted to comment and let you know how much I love your writing and stories. I am currently going through a rough patch in life and reading your blog has literally made me laugh out loud. A true gift.
I am not on facebook to pass this blog around, but I will say when I first started reading it, I actually emailed it on to a few friends and told them to read it because of how great it is. I will continue to do so, because your humor is really a bright spot in my day.
I can’t believe I am going to admit this, but I have actually gone through and read a lot of your archives now as well…what can I say, my job is slow
Keep it up, I love reading your stuff!
I have to admit, no blog reading in my past, you know the drill, working mother of 2 with a sloth husband…who eats Pop tarts in bed but still gets my partner for life award?!? My point is that while i found you through Jenny, you are on my favorites bar.
Get it? One click to Greg. One click to funny. The guy who kindly sends me an email when he posts a message for my enjoyment and when there is no email, I can still locate his blog in one click so i can read archives on the day when i need a laugh.
Never give up! You are the best
I usually overthink any comments I leave, but this one is off the cuff because I feel very strongly about some points you’ve made in your post. Please take these observations with a grain of salt (and forgive any incoherence or grammatical errors).
You are a very good writer. In my opinion, you have not overestimated your talent. The question is, what are you using to measure your talent? I can be wrong, but I don’t believe it is fair to measure your worth or influence as a writer strictly by how fast word of you travels.
I am a reader who found you via the Bloggess. Every blog I regularly read was found via ANOTHER blog that I enjoy reading. It’s the only way I know to find bloggers I like, which probably means I am behind the times (never heard of Babble or The Stir). I am grateful to Bloggess for being a portal to your writing. However, your writing alone is what has kept me as a reader.
Your content is honest, real, substantial, and funny. You are able to illustrate the nuances of your life (and, on a large scale, everybody’s) with humor. You aren’t just sharing your writing with us; you are sharing you. You are sharing your family. You are sharing the highs and lows of life, of what you care about, of what you find hilarious or subject-worthy. From my limited experience, THAT is what readers connect with and return to. It is why this reader checks your blog nearly every day.
In short, you have created a community here. However small or large this community is, however much it will grow…you have our attention. You have our encouragement. You have us at your URL, eagerly awaiting the next post.
Regarding product reviews and sponsored posts…to be honest, I am one of those people who is burnt out on folks trying to sell me stuff. I admire your unwillingness to write about a product or service that you do not have a personal desire to write about. The kind you do have a personal desire to write about is the only kind I want to read about.
P.S. I forget that blogs are a two-way street and that lurking does not convey how much posts are appreciated. You have reformed a lurker into a comment-leaver. You might regret this in the future, hehe.
I’m a 76 year old caregiver to a husband with terminal cancer, and I really believe that laughter is the best medicine. I need you, whether or not you are famous!
I’m sorry to hear that but I love your philosophy. Wishing you the best and hopefully I’ll be able to keep delivering the prescription you need.
If you don’t mind, I’m going to copy most of this and post it on my blog.
PS: Get out of my head.
When I left the comment above, I was making a joke about the fact that you had put words to a number of thoughts I have had. It wasn’t until later that I actually decided to write about it … by which time I forgot that I had written the above comment in jest. In retrospect, it now seems like an obnoxious, non-joking comment, because I did, in fact, cannibalize large swaths of this post. So now, with sincerity, I say: I hope you didn’t mind.
Daddy Scratches´s last post…Botany, booze and music trivia. This post has it all, baby.
All of your comments are kickin’ my arse in a good way. You all are too awesome. Now, please understand that I’m not standing on a ledge somewhere. Nor do I have any inclination of quitting. This is really just a hearty vent to clear my head of frustration. I already feel better and your words are psyching me up. Thank you!
I’m not much of an optimist. I think the situation–and by “situation”, I mean the fact that there are 1) sixty billion blogs and 2) a lesser amount but still shockingly high amount of writing talent out there means that many worthy writers/blogs will never get noticed.
And, of course, the market structure is all out of whack. Quite simply–it’s a readers’ market, rather than a writers’ market. Said another way, if the blogosphere were the real estate market, we’d all be living in houses we bought for a penny. Like it is in Detroit.
My point being–there is too much quaility content like yours out there for free, which makes the people who end up getting paid to do it (book deal, high traffic blog with lots of sponsorship, column on Babble, or whatever) akin to getting struck by lightening. The paid gig, in the scheme of things, is so rare it qualifies as random like lightening.
So, I think, in the end–that leaves most bloggers writing because they enjoy it, they have a voice they want to use, and they like connecting with people.
I enjoy your blog because the presentation is professional and the writing is clear and impeccably clean (I mean grammatically–not curse-word-clean, although it’s also that). And it’s funny. My vote is for you to pull the trigger on those shorter posts so you don’t wear yourself out.
Excellent points, especially the remark about there being sixty billion blogs. I know attention is easily diverted and it’s like I’m shouting in a crowded stadium hoping those outside it hear me. In due time, perhaps. But even if it never happens, knowing there are a few dozen people rolling in laughter because of my blog is gift enough.
I live in Denmark, Scandinavia. That’s transatlantic and has to count for something am I right?
Found you through The Bloggess and stayed because your writing brings a smile to my face. I found you recently so I’m working my way through your archives as we speak… or type.
Sorry for the probably horrendous spelling and grammar, but yeah… Danish you know
I LOVE danishes so you’re already a fave. Thank you for being among those to help me bridge the international gap!
Another testimonial! I like the others came here via the bloggess. I used to be an avid reader of all kinds. However in January of this year my brother passed away unexpectedly and it threw me into a coma of sorts. I’ve recently come out and started reading again. I actually found you via my brothers widow. She sent me to Hyperbole, through which I found Jenny and now you. I love your writing. You AND your wife are awesome. I love that she saved the dog. You are funny. Like many other people I check everyday for a new post and sometimes multiple times a day when work is slow. You rock. Keep it up. You’ve all together inspired me to start my own blog.
Beth´s last post…My name is Beth and….
“I want to be a mood-altering literary substance”
Maybe, and I’m just spitballin’ here, but just maybe you are trying too hard to attain this goal.
Be you. Blog about stupid/funny/irreverent stuff, and see what happens.
Ultimately, though, you have to write because you simply cannot not write.
It’s that passion that fuels your life. Hell, it fuels the life of every writer and many toil away without any real recognition for their work.
I write because I must. If I didn’t, I think I’d probably get all stabbity on everyone around me. It’s not just something I do, it’s who I am.
It’s who you are, too.
For the record, I came to your blog the first time because of your presence on Twitter. You are a kind and helpful (and funny!) guy and that is what drew me to read more. Since then, I have subscribed and read everyday.
I will never be famous either but for different reasons. Then again, I don’t want to be famous. I am happy being able to go to the grocery store without makeup.
For what it is worth, I think you are more famous than you believe.
Greg, I love your blog! Yes, I found you through Jenny’s but I now frequent yours more than hers (no offense to the queen!!). I just don’t always have time to read both and when faced with a choice, I choose you
I love reading about you and your family. You crack me up! I have told most of my friends about you and tried to get all those other people I call friends (facebook) to check you out as well. Keep it up! You’re definitely on my top list and one day I’m sure you’ll be on all of them!!
I was surprised to learn that you’re not on any of the Top (#) Lists – surely there’s a Top Firetruck Owner Blog List?
Like all things in life – do what you do for you. Don’t apologize for being authentic. Ever. However, if you want to be “famous” on the internet, you’ll have to concede that there is in fact a business model to follow. All those “oh I just started this blog to keep in touch with family – didn’t know I’d get to be this big a deal” stories are just that – stories.
I found you through someone posting one of your blogs on facebook!
I’ve never read another blog. I read you every day now. Have no plans to read anybody else’s blog. I really enjoy reading you. Loved the Pink Floyd post! Definitely don’t stop writing….if you are meant to be found, you will be found. If not, then you will still have had many hours of enjoyment doing what you love. Thank you!
I love your blog, and your sense of humor. I thought your post about the double hernia (Look, honey. Twins!) was about the funniest thing I’ve ever read. And the road trip diaries are just like mine.
I lurk, and don’t often comment. But I want you to know that your entertaining entries are often the highlight of my day. Thank you for that!
I have to admit that of the people listed on TheBloggess’s blog, you are the only one I read. You’re real, you’re honest, and you are relatable. The best stories aren’t the ones made up, its real life! I have turned a couple people on to you via Facebook, as most of the posts that you have blogged have me laughing so hard I’m crying (especially “Dissipline”. I have never read anything so funny in my life. Perhaps because my youngest just turned 4, and I am content now knowing that I’m not the only one who’s had the same experiences. You put such a humurous spin on it that I find it hard not to laugh at her quirks that used to anger me.) I also make the mistake of reading about your life at work, and I’m pretty sure they are close to institutionalizing me because everytime they look over, I’m giggling like a fiend. On that note, I LOVE that your blog is completly safe for work. I wish more blogs were F-Bomb free. Buuuuut, I assuem they are not as most of them are blocked by “WebSense” for “adult content”.
But in all seriousness, I respect you. Your outlook on life, the way you parent, the way you see your wife. You have such a big heart, what with rescuing Dory, the Sweet Dreams Fund, just to name a few. Granted, you could be some 82 year old pedophile posing as “Greg” and you’re really storing bodies in your basement and the flagstone project in your backyard wasnt JUST to build a patio, but a coverup. But I doubt it
I know that if you dont post anything on a certain day that real life is happening to you. And I love that your blog is not so large that its impersonal. You can read every comment and respond if you choose. You constantly thank your readers for making it what it is. I dont read a blog to feel appreciated, but my god, I do with yours!
My suggestion: Facebook. I actually am a fan of (what I hope is) your page. If its not, may I suggest starting one? Posting links to your blog posts, website information for the Sweet Dreams fund, and links to your other interweb affilitiations could be beneficial to up readership and awareness of the issues and organizations close to your heart.
Most of all, THANK YOU. I appreciate you allowing me to step into your life for 5 minutes a day. It helps me put things into perspective, it brings me back to reality, and it helps me remember what my real priorites in life are.
So it’s true that I did find you via the Bloggess. BUT i bookmarked you right next to hers and have been a faithful follower since. AND I posted a link to you on my FB page. Doesn’t that count for something?
I have been a lurker for a few month, but at least once a week I have to share your blog on my facebook and with various other friends. You are definitely one of my top blogs to check out every day….yes, along with the Bloggess….
I enjoy reading about your adventures every day, funny or not.
Ok, so, NO JOKE! I was JUST thinking…why do I keep going to tellingdad through Bloggess??? Because, well, I do. It is easier. I was also thinking, I should just put tellingdad in my favorites or bookmarks or something…so, that is what I will do.
I did find you via the Blogess. I have no children, just my furbabies. My parents were divorced when I was very young and I didn’t have a strong “father presence” in my life. My work/school life leaves me almost no time for pleasure reading, and often my only time to search for a blog entry to read is waiting for a data extract to finish or an automated process to run before my next meeting. I didn’t think when I linked to your page that we would have enough in common to justify spending my precious few free minutes each day browsing material I could not relate to. What resulted instead was laughter ringing through my cubicle wall so loudly that all of my neighboring coworkers popped their heads over the wall to see what on earth was happening to me. Your blog is bookmarked on my browser as the #1 go-to spot for whenever I have a few free minutes. I am a frequent linker of your material on my Facebook feed (the Screamo/Cookie monster bit was a hit) and you provide my friends and I some much needed comic relief on a stressful day. Your writing has been a great source of “mood-altering literary substance” to me this week as my oldest dog passed away two days ago. I may not be showering or eating yet, but I am grateful to be able to escape into your writing. Even a five minute reprieve from my grief helps tremendously. I know you are not standing on a ledge somewhere, but I do want you to know that your writing means something to me. I think you are a wonderful father, a fantastic writer and a quality human being. I really hope this blog becomes what you want it to be…you deserve that. But do know that this blog is everything I have needed it to be in MY life, and I thank you.
I admit that I found your blog through Jenny, the Bloggess but I come toyour blog daily because I love the way you write and you sincerely make me laugh. I have to admit, I’m also a sucker for animals so Dory’s Bucket List is pretty awesome too. Please don’t ever stop writing!
I look forward to reading your blog each day at lunch. I did find you through Jenny but I’m glad I did. Your stories are always funny and make me laugh. It’s healthy to vent. Get it off your chest. Keep doing what you’re doing and one day you’ll get that book deal you’ve been working so hard for. I have recommened your blog on my facebook status. that was a couple of months ago when I first found you. Will repost again and hopefully the right person will find you. Keep your head held high!!
For what it’s worth, I enjoy reading your blog. And I wish you would post more short posts. You can post more than once a day, too, y’know! As for fame, it ain’t all it’s cracked up to be, but it also takes time, so hang in there! And in the meantime, can you come redo my landscaping, ’cause you are awesome at it! And you have muscles. My husband and I are weak little blobs of goo. Who are lazy. And really good at procrastinating.
Ditto what Daddy Scratches said. I’ve been blogging for 2.5 years now, and I think my mom has started commenting on my posts a lot more… And BTW, I only read, like, four blogs. Yours is one of them.
I am new to your site – reading for about 4 months but I do check in every day to read your blog. It makes my day.
Okay, yes I found you through Blogess – but I found her through EpBot – which I found through CakeWrecks. Where we readers come from isn’t the point. The point is, we/I stay because of you.
I don’t subscribe to many “humor” blogs (in fact, you plus those other 3 are it) and I certainly don’t comment – and now you’ve gotten 2 of those out of me in a week.
So, I say get some cheetos and a turkey dinner to eat in bed, and keep up the good work.
I. LOVE. YOU.
Okay, my husband says I can’t do that, but I love your posts!! And I have introduced all my kids to you too (that’s 7, mind you) so there would be 9 of us devastated if you stopped posting!! You so deserve to be published! You are the Erma Bombeck of men (did I just date myself?).
You just made his day comparing him to Erma Bombeck!
I am one who came via the Bloggess, but stayed because of you. You are in my favorites and I visit daily hoping for a new post. That being said, I’m curious, what kind of book do you want to write? Have you considered self publishing? I am currently writing a book (I am horrible about making myself do it though so it’s now going on 3 years) and in the back of my mind I am considering self publishing when I finish. Even on Amazon you can put it up there for Kindle downloads. Do you submit anything to magazines for publishing?
It doesn’t matter to me that whether or not you’re famous. You’re fun and interesting to read and that’s what keeps me coming back. Also…I like saying I “know” someone who owns a firetruck. My dream is also to be a writer. In fact, I wrote a novel and did try to get it published, but couldn’t get someone to even read it. Depressing, but typical…..or so I’m told.
I came via the Bloggess (cause if Victor finds you funny, you must be amazing…you are!) but stayed because I can relate, you write what’s relevant to you and that kind of realism is awesome, you’re my daily dose of laughter, and the top daddy blog in my book! There are a million and 7 mommy bloggers but you’re one of the few (I think there’s 3 I read?) daddy blogs I enjoy and check daily…
plus, I love how you and I share the same night-time diet, apparently. Sorry Heather, but I love me some late night steak and potatoes.
I swear that if you stop writing, I will fly my heavily pregnant self to your address (I’ll find you, don’t worry) and force your hands to meet the keyboard again whilst munching on some crackers, sitting a bike parked in your living room.
I also found you through the Bloggess, but stayed since your blog is hilarious! My husband and I read daily. I subscribe via RSS and click through to your site to finish every post, which is saying a lot cause I’m lazy and prefer to have my content spoon fed to me in Google reader.
I recently started a blog and look to you for inspiration, so keep up the good work. Thanks for being awesome.
I first read your blog from a Bloggess post MONTHS ago but now I visit your blog every couple of days. Love your sense of humor and outlook on life! Keep up the great writing!
Put your big boy panties on and deal with it. If book deals happened with every writer that deserved to be published, the publishing field would be much different I think. Getting a book deal is a damn big deal sort of like making it to rock star status…just because you are good and have it all going on they aren’t going to come looking for you. You have to treat this like a business deal if that is what you want, market yourself and your humor. Yes, SEO is that important, links are that valuable, you are looking for people to find you then you are going to have to reach farther than writing a super funny great blog. Get more niche than you are. Fellow entrepreneur and fan.
I know this wasn’t a “Why am I still doing this? Should I keep doing this?” type post, as you’ve already said it wasn’t.
That said, if there’s any discouragement or frustration, just know that it’s *this blog* that keeps me posting on my little one. (That has a readership of 6, count them 6 people. I believe those 6 include my spouse, and a few BFFs…)
Why yours? Because of all the reasons you’ve already written in various places. Jenny at The Bloggess is hilariously profane. You? I can talk about you at the Mom’s Luncheon and not offend the more conservative moms. I can read whole posts to my husband and he doesn’t roll his eyes at the “too girly” post, instead he nods his head and says things like, “YES! Exactly! That dude rocks!” (a high compliment from him, I may add). Your voice is unique, and it will only be a matter of time before the book deals and the commercial agreements hit your inbox. I have faith.
I was going to comment eariler but two young kids, a dog that is nocturnal, and a hubby who just got out of the hospital makes for one tired mama. Anyway I LOVE your blog. True I can across you because of The Bloggess (who I LOVE as well) but that shouldn’t matter
I was coming and checking everyday until I figured out “Hey maybe I should sign up to get notified when he updates rather than stalk him.” I love hearing about Dory. I love hearing about Heather (and not only because she has the best name on the planet.) I talk about your blog all the time to my hubby, my mom, friends, etc. That alone will make you famous. 
Just wanted to share the love.
Dude….
my blog world is falling apart. First Jenny, now you. Snap out of it man. You are famous, I talk about you all the time and my kids….OMGosh, don’t even get me stared on how much they talk about the family who saved Dory
I DO hope this blog turns out to be exactly what you want it to be, although there is something really wholesome here that feels good and I’m not sure but I think it’s because you’re not some huge commercialized thing.
As much as I love the bloggers that were aforementioned, and yeah, that’s how I got here too, those people don’t seem within reach. They have too many readers, too many messages, too many people wanting their time that to actually reach them in a real way, aint gonna happen. But you, you’re real, you’re like right there responding to people and interacting with readers. I’m just one, but I think you’re completely groovy just the way you are!
I did find you through the blogess, and I’m so glad I did because you’re hilarious. I will keep reading your blog for as long as you keep writing it. Now having said that, don’t most people become published authors by… first writing a book? I mean this in the nicest way possible but I think the chances of getting a book deal through writing a blog (however funny and entertaining) are pretty slim, especially considering the number of high quality blogs out there nowadays. If you do write a book, I promise I will buy it.
I can say that you’re witty (yes), I can say that you make me laugh (indeed), but the highest compliment I can give is that you inspired me. True, it was to see what odd Google searches I might get as the result of a “where do you bury a frozen cat?” tag, but still. Inspirer!
Alison´s last post…Ol’ Blue Eyes
Yes, I found you through Jenny’s site months ago. But your humor keeps me coming back on a daily basis. Thank you for the laughs!
While it’s true, I found you on the basis of a recommendation from the Blogess, I have to tell you that I was thrilled to find you and have sent many people to your site by sharing a link to Dory’s story with them. I am pretty sure most are hooked on your blog as it is often a topic of conversation. We love ya, even if you aren’t famous yet!
Oh and we might have gotten hooked because of Dory but we love everything you write and went back to read your older material. Your latest post has inspired me to share the link to your site with all my facebook friends [not enough to cause your fame meter to rise much, but it can't hurt
]
I love your blog!! I did find you through the bloggess, and she’s funny, but I can relate so much to your life! When you write about your wife, kids, dogs, and insane purchases it cracks me up. I know I can always find a laugh or something uplifting on your blog, and it usually makes my day!
The only two blogs I follow (or have ever followed) are yours and Jenny’s. I don’t know either of you. I am a single mom and a full-time, public-school teacher – I have about 6 free minutes a week. I read your blog every day. Must be good stuff. Keep writing. BTW – we need a Dory update!
I find your blog very entertaining! Keep at it! Fame may be just around the corner.
Where to start….not sure how I got here, one thing led to another, likely the Bloggess, but who knows. I was on a binge of following blog links that day lol. However, you were bookmarked the first time I read a post here. And then I read more and more of your past posts and I was hooked. You’re funny, yet normal. No F-bombs. You don’t take yourself seriously and have a sense of humor about life. That’s the part I love.
Besides, I am totally jealous of all your readers and commenters so get over your whiny self! It’s just a matter of perspective. I too love to write and that is exactly why I began my own blog. Different type of theme though lol but still, the same reason. And I can’t be brief no matter how much I try lol so you’re not alone there! Oh well.
How about you write your own list of all the positive things you do accomplish instead of those negatives? Your own top ten list?
Oh and if you want to write and publish a book, you can self-publish and put it on Amazon as an E-book. I know someone who taught herself to do it just this year and has published around 5 of them now. She has done very well with them.
Anyhow, stop comparing yourself and do what you love and see what happens. Write because you love to write. Period.
You make me laugh and for that I thank you. I hope knowing the enjoyment you bring to your readers is enough to make up for the lack of “fame”.
Add me to the masses who came here from The Blogess. I rarely comment on any blogs, but I wanted to add my voice to all the others who have said how much they enjoy your site. I have quite a few blogs in my reader, and yours is always the last one I read. I like to save the best for last. Keep writing and we’ll keep reading. I hope this becomes everything you want it to be!
I wanted to take a moment to thank everyone for your extraordinary words of support. While I swear that this wasn’t a pity post seeking an ego stroke, I’m sure it read that way. I’m not on the verge of quitting, I enjoy doing this too much, and I had no idea how many people read in the shadows.
I read a ton of great advice above and it echoes what my wife has been telling me for months. While self-publishing wasn’t something I wanted to do because I felt it’d be better if a publisher took notice beforehand, there were some great points about the industry as a whole. So, my first book will be written and published by myself. At least I can say that my book was never rejected.
Anyhow, again, thank you all. I wish I could address every comment individually but the sentiment and recurring theme would be the same…that I hear you loud and clear, that I appreciate your kind words, and that you totally made my day.
Just checking in from Hong Kong. Love the Blog – tell my husband every story and am hooked (and laddered) on the firetruck. And that lady from the DMV? Offer her a ride on the firetruck – she can be Chief For A Day(!) – that paperwork will get through in no time.
This blog is very funny! Don’t get discouraged, Just keep trying!!! I don’t even have kids and I read your blog. Your squirrel post was hilarious. It takes talent to have a humorous parenting blog and still appeal to twenty-something dog-owners.
Anyway, I can relate to this difficulty because I recently started a humor blog but have had a lot of trouble building the focus and getting it off the ground. Definitely relate to how hard it is to place everything through a mental filter of what the masses will like or not like or what will catch on! Just keep swimming!
I woudn’t know about how famous you’ll get, but let me tell me you just gained yourself a belgian fan. That’s huge, considering that we invented French fries (and the French stole ‘em from us!), have the best chocolate in the world and survive life without a government for over 400 days now…. this all isn’t making any sense, and you’d still have to thank Jenny. lol. But anyhows, I’m replying ’cause I can totally relate to what you’re saying about writing, because i’ve been writing for 35days straight now. About an apple. So yeah, totally on your side. And also a little crazy.
wishing you the fulfillment of your dreams!
Debby from Belgium.
I feel kind of like a traitor admitting that I, like so many others, hail originally from thebloggess.com. I’ve read Jenny’s blog religiously for FAR too long, and only clicked over here in the last month or so.But you know what? I LOVED your site, your writing style, and everything about what you stand for. So much that I went all crazy stalker and read all of your posts back to like, 2009. I am now and will be a regular reader from now on.
Hey, does it really matter where we come from if we get comfy and come back every day/week/month?
I too came from the bloggess, but I didn’t even know she existed until about a month ago, and she’s all “famous” and sh*t. I found her from a link on a friends blog that only about 5 people read. I love reading your posts and I’m slowly working my way back in time to your older ones. Great stuff!
Yikes! That was supposes to say 50, not 5! Now if my friend sees this she will totally kick my butt! THIS is why I don’t post things online, lol!
Dude, you’re being true to yourself and that makes you a real writer. People see through BS. Speaking of which–all those Top 10 lists and the “glitzziness,” etc. –it’s all BS too. There are more than a few “big name” mom and dad bloggers out there that get all the attention and accolades, and yet their writing is crap. They just know how to brand themselves to look good while their blogs are basically the equivalent of a polished turd. Don’t buy into the hype. From the looks of it, you’ve built a heck of a community here.
(I will preface this by admitting that trying to preread though the comments to see if anyone pointed this stuff out made my brain tired.)
Anyway, what do you mean, you don’t give out parenting advice? Shuck It has parenting advice, and whether you like it or not, every time you tell a story about your kids and how you handle situations with them, you are giving advice to other people one way or another, in a subconscious way. (Realizing that just now really makes me think!)
What makes us all love your blog is how and what you write, and that because it is about your life and experiences, it’s unique. Nothing unique is usually a “perfect fit” elsewhere- and if it was, it would probably not be as fun to read. Not everyone loves “controversy either. I, for one, get enough drama out of every day life, so I’m not looking for crisis and bombshells when I read your blog. I come to laugh, to hear the stories of another parent of a crazy 3 year old girl, and because I was touched by Dory’s story. You have moved people with your blog, as evidence by the comments. It takes a long time to cultivate a presence online. The online world is so vast, it’s like waving your hand and yelling, “Pick Me!” from outer space. But not only are you gaining readers, but we are telling others about you. Everyone starts somewhere and everyone needs a hand from someone more experienced, so don’t wouldn’t worry about where your readers are coming from, think of where they are taking you.
Keep on trucking! We love hearing from you, friend.
(Ok I meant to say “you shouldn’t worry about…”– I am a little OCD about correcting my messages when I flub.)
I hear ya! I just started writing mine about a month ago, as an exercise in “getting back to wtriting.” but I secretly always thought it would lead to me THE! MOST! AMAZING! BOOK DEAL! EVERRRR! Yes, even after a month, I thought maybe….
But mostly, it’s the shockingly low average daily visits figure that hurts my heart. Why, real-life friends, why haven’t you word-of-mouthed me to several thousand people who visit the site every single day? WHYYYYY?
BTW, I was talking to my mom about something I’d posted on my blog 3 weeks ago, and she had no idea what I was talking about….ouch, mom. Ouch. Even you?? LOL
I know, I need to write for me, and it will come. So they say. But damn it all to hell, I wanna get amazed by the continual influx of traffic!
Your stuff is great, but I totally feel ya.
Thanks for inspiring me to create my own blog! Okay, so you may have not been the only inspiration, but you’re one of few that I read daily. And don’t worry you’re already exponentially more famous that I’ll ever be!! Can’t wait to see pictures of fire truck pick up day!
I misread your “update” paragraph, and thought that you were stating you had no intention of quilting. Which was slightly confusing on several levels, but as I eyed the almost-finished-after-two-years quilting project I SWEAR will get done this weekend, what I was most confused about was when I’d missed quilting becoming a hobby of last resort, indicating desperation or possibly madness. Although if I’m fair, it often does induce madness in my household – either because I’ve realised that I lined up two pieces in the middle of my ridiculously complicated project wrong and now have to unpick it, or because I’ve discovered that I cut the pieces too small (or too big, or to the wrong dimensions entirely) and now have to sew tiny hems to make them fit (or recut, or buy more fabric) or because my husband’s patience for having the dinner table covered in scraps of fabric that he is NOT ALLOWED to put away is wearing thin, or possibly because I have dared commence another project while The Quilt remains incomplete.
So, ah, yeah… glad you’re not quilting, keep up the good (and non-sewing-oriented) work. Go fire trucks.
You are famous. You noob.
get over it.
So I’m a Paramedic and I work at night. While I’m at work I surf the net and look for funny and interesting blogs. I came across yours tonight. JACKPOT!!!! I am laughing hysterically and my partner keeps asking if I’m ok. This is funny stuff my friend. Love the fire truck by the way!!!
I didn’t read all the comments but I’ll echo some that I did read.
I found this blog via the Bloggess’s site, but I stay because your blog is awesome. I’ve checked out other links/blogs from her sidebar but this is the only one so far that I think is a keeper. (My husband always says “flattery will get you everywhere” but I’m telling the truth!) I’ve been reading your blog entries out loud to my husband and he’s been cracking up right alongside me.
I will also admit to being a tad jealous. I write, but I’m a horrid failure when it comes to blogging. I’m neither funny (unless you count funny looking) nor profound nor (in my opinion) interesting enough for people to read any blog I’d write. All the other blogs (crafting, fashion, hobbies) just don’t interest me. So I write books. I like making things up from my head and putting them down on paper. I also like the fact that if I don’t write for a week it’s ok- I don’t have to write every day. If I’m in a slump or just don’t feel like it or just have one of those days (you know…one of THOSE days, omg) then I can simply put writing off till the next day.
Of course who knows how good my writing is. I have yet to be published, ha. Maybe someday!
In the meantime, I’ll keep coming here. I can always use a good laugh!