SUBSCRIBE VIA RSSIf it seems like my blog is dominated by talk of dogs with loose morals and even looser bowels, it’s because my life is dominated by dogs with loose morals and even looser bowels.
When you’re awakened at 4am by the pungent stench of raw sewage only to discover a family room scene that makes you wish it were raw sewage, you’re left to wonder why dogs were even invented.
And when your wife absconds with your toothbrush so she can carve fecal splatter out from the cracks of your hardwood floors, you’re left to wonder why you were even invented.
“Why me? Why now? Just…why?” seems to be a recurring theme in our household. A household that is defiled day after day by pets who have little to no regard or respect for their masters’ domicile.
Two nights ago, I shot awake from a sudden attack on my nostrils and said something I never, ever, not once in my entire life, ever thought I’d say out loud:
“Damn. I REALLY hope that’s dog fart.”
Who wishes for that? Who has it so bad in their canine-owning lives that they have come to welcome…no, cherish, the aroma of dog flatulence?
Us. That’s who. And I think we’re alone. Because if piles of lumpy stew-like masses were as common for others as it is for us, there’s no way millions of dogs would be welcomed into millions of homes. Instead, there’d be pages and pages of Yellow Book exterminators. Much like there are for bugs, rodents, and other unwanted vermin that would actually be a treat right about now.
This dog has two choices when he feels that “when you gotta go, you gotta go” urge. One, he can let loose on the linoleum in our kitchen, which is easy to clean. Or two, he can desecrate our living area by blasting fecal chili all over our original hardwood floors. Thereby ensuring that the cleanup process will help fill the slats with gag-inducing ooze.
This time, like every other time, he chose the hardwood. On a night when we were out of paper towels thanks to another furry offender’s early Christmas gift. Forced to use two giant beach towels that once enjoyed ocean breezes and suntan oil, we relegated them to slop duty before casting them into the frigid night air. Just two more examples of textile casualties in our war against canines.
Making matters worse, we have a 12-foot Christmas tree, dozens of feet of real garland, and decorative holiday boughs throughout the house. Take it from me, pine-scented diarrhea is worse than it sounds.
To try and mask the aroma, my wife felt it necessary to double-fist two cans of Gingersnap Febreze and aerate the home until it smelled like an entire army of Gingerbread men took a giant dump in our family room. Christmas will never be the same for me. Jackson ruined it. You know all those sweet holiday smells you remember as a child? Consider them killed.
And this is our good dog. Remember Dory? The pup we rescued who spent her entire life tied to a barn? Well, she’s now doing her best to smell like one.
She’s a smaller dog, roughly 1/3 the weight of Jackson, but what she lacks in volume, she heartily makes up for in both quantity and frequency. And because she’s half-blind, half-deaf, and all the way dumb, she just wanders around the house leaving little trails of poop nuggets as she walks.
Either she has no clue it’s even happening, thereby supporting my claim that she’s dumb; or she’s doing it so she can later find her way back to family room, which would also support my claim that she’s dumb.
Her namesake, that cute little Ellen DeGeneres fish from Finding Nemo was forgetful and borderline moronic as well, but everyone loved her along with all of her quirks. It’s the same situation with our own Dory. We love her along with all of her quirks. Except for her oblivious poop-in-stride quirk. That one I could do without.
We can’t yell at Jackson for unloading considering he’s sick and doesn’t possess the opposable thumbs necessary to open doors. And we can’t yell at Dory because even if she remembered what she did three seconds ago, it’s not like she can hear us or even see us admonishing her.
She didn’t used to be this bad about it. It’s almost like she’s regressing. Same with Jackson. It’s as though they’re taking cues from each other and justifying their filthy behavior because, “Hey, if she can do it…so can I.” And it’s this canine regression that’s killing our floors, our home, and our peace of mind. It’s like they take one step forward and two crap-dispersing steps back.
Can you understand how helpless we feel knowing that we have the Nell of Retriever mixes in this house? And before you say anything, I know what you’re thinking…you’re going to share all kinds of dog wisdom with me. Waxing stories about repetition and feeding them tablespoons of pumpkin mush and having patience. Bah!
Understand that before you even say a word, I hear ya. I heard ya last time. The problem isn’t effort. It’s breaking a 12-year habit of defecating where ye lay because you were chained to the same six-foot radius your entire life.
And before you recommend crating for either dog, understand that we tried this and neither one cared a lick about rolling around in their own feces. You’d think that being confined to such close quarters would dissuade them from defecating on themselves, but what do they care? All it taught them is that they’ll get a nice refreshing bath soon afterwards.
When I see people skipping and galloping about the park with their shiny happy dogs faithfully by their sides, I can’t help but think that they have an entirely different perspective and experience when it comes to dog ownership. Some say the joy of dog ownership is in the companionship, the unconditional love, and the happy-go-lucky play that takes place each day.
You want to know what makes us happy? When we actually go a day…just ONE day…without cleaning up “accidents” that don’t really have the vibe of accidents at all.
You know it’s time to reassess your life when a dog fart precedes relief. That’s just not right and these aren’t life moments that anyone disclosed to me before acquiring animals.
I told Heather that when Jackson and Dory die, we’re swearing off dogs forever. We’re done. We’re going to get our life back.
If anything’s gonna crap on our floors, it’s gonna be us.
_________________________________
{ 1 trackback }
{ 55 comments… read them below or add one }
Oh gross … I’m afraid to say it, but I think if the dog has gotten to the point of not being able to crate train, there’s no hope without a professional, even then, it sounds like a long shot. Do yourself, and your floors, a favor, find a nice farmer or country living family that needs an outdoor dog .. or at least one with a barn where they won’t care if it gets crapped on.
Oh, we’ll never get rid of them. Jackson’s on his last wobbly legs anyhow and Dory will never go abandoned again. I threaten to leave them in the middle of nowhere but my heart, compassion, and conscience would never allow it.
Oh man I feel ya. To soften the blow of the loss of our older dog, we got her a little playmate in the form of a 3-month old poop machine. We got her in October. $1100 later, we spend $16 every two weeks on jumbo packages of paper towels and resolve with oxy, for those extra special gifts from the pooches. And, same with you- it isn’t for lack of trying. We tried crate training, I’d be getting out of bed at 2am for the first 2 weeks to let her out. When she wasn’t letting go in the crate, she was going on our kitchen floor.
About a week ago, I thought, maybe, just maybe, she was moving on from this putrid stage, as I wasn’t finding any lumps of love on the floor… well, good ole Maddie took it a step further. Instead of just dropping it, she now, wait for it- eats it. Gag. On the plus, at least she is cleaning up after herself. Ew.
Dogs. Drive me nuts, but for whatever reason, I love them anyway. This one makes my last dog look like a shining angel. Good luck with the poop problems! =/
And maybe now I will never get a dog… gross!
And… that just annihilated any desire to own a dog. Thank you for the very funny (and so, so sad) story that serves as the equivalent to pet-owning birth control.
I had one when I was growing up who instead of pooping everywhere vomited everywhere. The smell of carpet, vomit and vinegar is a sense memory I’d like to forget.
May Christmas bring you respite from the odor of fecal matter, if only for a day, Greg. Goodness.
Two suggestions:
Doggie door (if you have a fenced in back yard)
Gating them off in the kitchen at night (easier to clean)
I’m not gonna share any dog wisdom with you, all I’m gonna say is DogBless both for the kindness and commitment you and your family have shown these animal as well as for making me laugh so much that tears ran down my leg.
Yikes… I totally feel for you. The first two years that I had my lab we had to clean up after her every… single… flipping… morning. At least once, mind you. It was unbelievably frustrating, and downright disgusting. But animals are a blessing, even if they can be the most foul creatures to ever grace the planet. I hope things get better for you guys!
I feel for you. I have a halfway done post about my geriatric dog I haven’t finished. Mine is a different gross and I too swear off pets in general after this one is gone. Lucky for me it was still FL was weather and he was banned to the porch for a day. That doesn’t work so well up North. I hope Santa brings a better air freshioner if he can stay long enough to unload his sack.
Echoing the changed-my-mind-about-dogs sentiments here. My cats are reliable kitty-litter users, so at least I know where the mess will be.
I still maintain that you have our dog. He must sneak back and forth between houses.
Our dogs is not a daily accident creator, but when he does it is EPIC. He weighs 120 lbs. and when he goes it looks like a dinosaur has attacked the house with its feces. His most recent crime? Actually pooping on our other dog. She was less than thrilled.
We crate our dogs because it seems to make them less anious, but when his tummy is upset he just goes for it. I came home and it smelled like I had walked into his small intestines. Nasty. Then I go to the crate and the Shelties is looking at me like “I would kick him in the balls for this if he had any”.
The basic gist of this? My sympathies to you and kudos for not being the kind of person that gets rid of a dog because they are inconvenient
I love the dinosaur visual, lol. Jackson too, is a large dog…150lbs. So when he messes the house, we mean the whole house. And forget the crate, if he poops himself, the only bath tub is upstairs and he hasn’t climbed stairs in 6 years. And now it is too cold to hose him down. UGH!!!
This post is totally the reason I bookmarked your blog. HILARIOUS!!! I mean, sorry about the poo, but this is laugh-out-loud funny.
Oh, man. I smell your pain.
We’ve had the elderly, disgustingly incontinent dogs (and a cat) before. Right now we’re dealing with an un-neutered rottweiler (because my husband’s under some delusion we’ll eventually breed him) and an un-neutered (actually fixed this afternoon) rescued alley cat who’ve been making our lives miserable recently.
I’d almost rather step in a puddle of dog semen while barefoot…wait! No, I’ve done that and had to bleach my feet and never want to do that again!
If you’ve got rugs, invest in a carpet shampoo vac. And lots and lots of Nature’s Miracle (available at Pet Smart and the best thing I’ve found for eliminating disgusting odors. I used to put it in the water supply when I wet vac’d and then sprayed more on top of the stain area once I got it out). Spot Shot (a spray; Home Depot) is another miracle.
I’d suggest an outdoor run, but in upstate NY in winter, probably not the best option, unless you’re trying for dog-sicles and traumatized wife and children.
Good luck, and shared sorta misery from someone who worries the damn dawg will piss on the presents after we wrap them Christmas eve.
Merry Christmas!
In theory you can learn when doggies need to “go” by timing when you feed them in the mornings/evenings. In theory. Theories are nice and make great fireplace fodder.
Good luck, and love them well!
OMG! You made me spit tea all over myself. Now I have a huge mess to clean up. But it’s okay, because it’s not dog poop and I’m smiling! Thanks for the laugh!
Total quote of the day:
“Damn. I REALLY hope that’s dog fart.”
Thank you. It is 9:15 pm and my day has JUST been made. God, I needed that!
The mental picture is plenty thank you; I’m glad this isn’t a scratch and sniff blog. If I were in your shoes, I’d be looking for an expert for some help. It seems like there should be something that you could do to make life more enjoyable for everyone involved.
My life revolves around my pets as well, and I am very thankful that it isn’t the assault on the senses that you’re experiencing. Yet.
What’re you feeding those dogs?! My dog once ate a baby ruth (I honestly don’t even remember buying the candy, but I remember finding the wrapper…in the middle of liquid poopy) and he had the worst stomach ache for 3 days!! I know you JUST changed the dog food…but maybe they’re even allergic to something in that dog food as well?
Geriatric dogs are like puppies. They have to be monitored constantly. Not only for potty breaks but also for vomit. I wish someone would have informed me of this early on. Expectations could have been properly set. We have two geriatric dogs so I can completely relate to your post. I’ve often wanted to write a post similar to this because like you, my life revolves around dog poop. As sad as it is.
We recently went through a period of sleepless weeks where we would wake up with every movement Shadow made throughout the night. Is she turning over? Is she walking to the hallway to poop? Oh, my God, its 6:45am and she’s not in the bedroom (which meant she was either in the kitchen waiting to go out or had already defecated on the wood floor and was afraid to come back upstairs).
After several “accidents,” Dexter, our other dog who sleeps downstairs began tattling on Shadow. When Shadow would tiptoe downstairs to wait for us to let her out, Dexter would come upstairs and alert us that she needed to go out. I suppose he got tired of her pooping in his bedroom and decided to take matters into his own hands. I appreciate this about Dexter, even though he is considered our “bad” dog.
Recently, we came to our senses and decided that dog poop was no longer going to control our lives. Now, we take Shadow out for a 5 minute jog right before bed. She poops and everyone sleeps through the night. Life is good… again…
Well, there goes my plan to make beef stew for dinner tonight.
I would probably go find a corner to cry in if our dog ever did anything that horrible. Our Chihuahua spends 75% of his life “marking” his favorite locations in our house. He’s been doing it for 10 years. Not nearly as bad as what your dog has been doing, but it’s still disgusting. I am so over cleaning up dog piss.
Oh, and here is someone else who can’t put the presents under the tree unless the dog is locked out of the living room! Isn’t it awesome?
I don’t know what we would have done if our dog hadn’t been so well trained for *most* of her life. She had troubles her last year (kidney failure), so we started using puppy pads and confining her to the kitchen (brand new hardwood floors!) at night. When she started not being able to make it through the night to poop (going at least twice each night), we knew she was getting close. She lived to almost 15 and for her, all of this was just old age. It became quite stressful though, to know that whoever got up first each morning had a lot of messy work to do before the coffee even got brewed! Forget about having company over. It is amazing what we live with for our dear pets. We had to put her down the day after Christmas last year and I was adament that we would never get another dog. To deal with our loss, my children and I decided to volunteer at a maternity animal shelter – you know – just to get some lovin’ without the work of owning. Guess who’s getting a puppy in the spring! (Even after reading all of this!)
Ewwwwww!!! I had a dog who was crate trained and didn’t have a problem pooping on himself either! It is much easier to clean the floor then it is to get a dog who is covered in poo to the bathroom without making a mess anywhere else in the house!
Now I am feeling thankful for my dogs…I have three dogs in diapers. One had to have a tumor removed from the top of his head and cant control his bladder anymore. One is older than dirt and will dribble pee since he doesnt have full control and the other is just an ass who likes to mark everything in the house.
And I have a three year old who I just got out of diapers. Its a little ironic.
We run the geriatric home for wayward pets at our house (3 dogs ranging from 15yrs to 9yrs old and a 13 yr old cat)…and totally feel your pain. The best we’ve figured out is to contain them at night to areas that are easier to clean than say the WHITE carpet in the bedroom of our new home (carpet that ALMOST caused me to not buy the house at all because it is destined to be destoryed and have to be ripped out in no time).
Our home is now totally segmented by baby gates – but the mess stays off the hardwoods. And when one of them comes and lays her sweet, gray head in my lap for a snuggle – my heart melts with the memories of our life together and I dred the day when I don’t need baby gates.
So sweet.
Oh. Gross.
I’ve had cats that couldn’t make it to the litter box and that was MORE than enough for me to deal with. I couldn’t imagine something heavier than me crapping on my floor. Since all my cats are gone, I have fish. And they don’t stink when they poop. Or any other time for that matter. Except for that one snail that died….. he stunk REALLY bad.
Moral of the story: I am content, and any ill-advised thought in my head that I would one day like to own a dog is offically smooshed
As I wipe the tears from my eyes I thank the pet fairy that she saw fit to give me cats for nearly trouble-free companionship.
I also thank her for giving you dogs so I can laugh to the point of tears on a regular basis.
Gross, gross, double-gross.
While I admire your commitment I have to admit… if it were my house one dog would have made it to the country life by now, and the other would be gated in the kitchen… and would probably not be far off from going to doggy heaven.
I sympathize with the plight of all the homeless dogs, but I also believe that animals have a contract with the people who shelter them, and when they persist in breaking their end of the contract… I have no trouble ending the relationship in a thoughtful and humane manner.
We had a little dog who became aggressive toward children. We tried training. When that didn’t help, we crated her to keep the children safe. When the crating began to constitute unfair portions of her life, we contacted a rescue and found her a home with a lady who had no children and the time and expertise to devote to working with her.
Likewise, I had a duck who simply refused to go into her safe shelter at night. I tried a variety of measures to make it more inviting for her, but still I was spending twenty minutes a night trying to catch her and get her in. I have a lot of experience with ducks and ducky ways, and still I couldn’t figure out how to get her in without a nightly struggle. Finally I let her stay out. The local foxes had a lovely duck dinner that night. I felt a little bad but–she broke the contract and she broke it bad.
I know my view is different than the popular view at present, the belief that animal “ownership” is a lifetime commitment, and a responsibility to make that animal’s life as ideal as humanly possible, no matter what. My belief is that dogs & cats & horses (and goats and many others for that matter–all the domesticated breeds) made an evolutionary compact with humans, and that there is nothing wrong with holding them to their end of the deal. Most of the time, the compact works out pretty darn well for animals–look at the life of a wild animal for comparison–nasty, brutish, and short. Sometimes it doesn’t work well for the animals, and that’s a real shame, a blot on the reputation of humankind.
But the fact that some animals are abused doesn’t, to me, mean I’m obligated to offer unconditional hospitality to any animal that I ever invite into my home.
None of this, by the way, is intended to criticize you for your valiant efforts with your pups. I admire your (ahem) doggedness. And I will say that I do not expect elderly pets to live up to the same standards as young ones–if they’ve lived by the agreement all their lives, then I consider it part of *my* contract to care for them in their old age, even when they begin puking on my carpet every morning. On the other hand, I have no problem offering them a comfortable and peaceful death when they no longer are enjoying their life. I wish someone could do the same for me some day–I don’t believe death is the end of the story, so I’d prefer to skip the really gruesome and uncomfortable bits during the transition, thankyouverymuch.
Anyway. Best of luck with your dogs… Happy un-poop-y Christmas.
So there’s a new toothbrush on your Christmas list, isn’t there?
Oh, my sides. I truly feel bad for laughing so heartily at your misfortune (thanks for the giggles, btw), but c’mon. You’re creating the funny here.
I have a geriatric lab who will occasionally leave a nugget lying around the house (never assume it’s a Polly Pocket accessory), but I can’t imagine what you’re going through. I’m new to your blog (love it!), so I don’t know Jackson’s whole story, but have you tried Purina Fortiflora powder in his food? You have to get it from your vet, but I swear to you it’s like magic fairy dust. Or magic farty dust. Either way, it’s fab.
Good luck and a huge high five for taking Dory out of that miserable existence she was living.
I hope you have a poop-free Christmas…
Hahaha! Best Christmas greeting ever! I’m now singing:
We wish you a poop-free Christmas…
We wish you a poop-free Christmas…
We wish you a poop-free Christmas…
And a sweet-scented New Year!
HaHa…the Nell of lab mixes. HAHAA! That was great at 9 in the morning!
Pine-scented diarrhea” had me rolling on the floor!!
Do they make diapers for dogs?
I think I’d totally be strapping a Depends with a tail hole on them both! I kept threatening to do that for our cat that had kidney problems…but with the claws and all I figured we’d be trying to clean up shredded diaper soaked in cat pee. Ahh!
My grandma’s teacup pomeranian has the little issue of excitement dribbles. So, whe wears a standard huggies diaper with a hole cut out for her tail. She doesn’t seem to mind at all. The diaper gets removed for trips outside. And she knows she has to be…ahem…inspected after she’s done her business outside to be sure that fluffy hair isn’t harboring any uh…dangling balls of grossness. And it’s back into a new diaper and on with life. Of course, I’m not sure huggies makes a diaper appropriate for a 150 lb dog. Maybe you don’t have to swear off dogs forever. Maybe you just have to buy a dog you can fit into Huggies when he/she gets old.
Either way, you have my sympathy. Dogs tug at our hearts but sure are hard on the floors and furniture and sometimes the sanity. I feel confident that Dory (as dumb as she is) and Jackson realize that they’re very lucky.
Oh, sir, you are not alone. We are the proud caretakers of a 14-year old Lab. My husband and I decided some time ago that if either of our job situations change, we are both fully qualified to start a rug cleaning service.
“Damn. I REALLY hope that’s dog fart.” – priceless. Nearly had to clean tea off the Mac. And thanks for the best giggle I’ve had in a very trying week.
Omg I laughed til I cried at “You know it’s time to reassess your life when a dog fart precedes relief.” This was my life for the last year of my chocolate lab’s life, until at 14 years old I had to put him down. While he was my best little friend, and he is sorely missed, his ’round the clock soft-serve style poos are not. I too would rejoice after a day of no messes to clean up. But cleaning up Charlie’s messes was two-fold, bc he would crap and then immediately fall into the crap–totally awesome. I did get rid of all of my rugs but was then faced with the equally unappealing problem of soft poo in the cracks of the hardwood floors. Oh boy I feel your pain… Good luck to you. And I love your blog
I own a 1 1/2 year old boxer who I love. Traveling over the holidays, we stop in Tennessee to get something to eat. We leave Lucy in the car after letting her go tinkle first. We go back to the car and you automatically smell poop. At first we thought she was just farting it up once again, but when I turned on the light, she had runny poop in the back floor board. It was disgusting, but all I could do was laugh. Then my husband (who has a weak stomach) puts papertowels up his nose to try and not breath in the horrid stinch. He gets it cleaned up pretty good, but we had to ride in the cold with the windows down for awhile to be able to breath. I had to ride in the backseat with her the rest of the way home because my 10 yr old refused to sit with her. She laid in my lap the rest of the way. She knew what she did was wrong, but just couldn’t help it. Hope this made you laugh, like it did me.
Aww…don’t swear them off forever. Take a break and then rescue another. They need loving homes and yours is certainly one of them. I’ve been lucky, I guess with mine. My last one, rest her soul, was 4 when I got her and housebroken. The one I have now, Roxy (whom my husband calls Roxzilla) is so housebroken, it’s almost annoying. (not really..it’s a good thing). She has so many ways of telling you she has to go out, it’s kind of comical. She goes from jumping the height of the door to nudging you to sitting on you or sitting next to you and wrapping her leg around yours. Sometimes she will stand in front of you and chase her tail and if you wait too long, she gets angry and will charge you and yell at you.
They’re not all alike and unfortunately yours may just be doing what you think…feeding off each other.
Doggy diapers and baby gates to keep them in the kitchen at night? I had a sick puppy who needed both:s I feel for you guys but maybe give those two things a thought even if its just at night?
Oh you crack me up! I have been reading all of your dog stories and thinking someone actually understand how I feel! I too have sworn off dogs in the future! My present machine is 16 years old and too loved to say goodbye to but oh man! I get it! Love your blog and your humor is perfect!!!!
My bf and i are starting a flagstone patio project in the morning, and i ran across your project post. It gave me a good laugh and convinced me we should take a year long sabbatical to do it. However, this post had me laughing hysterically with sympathy and self-pity. You are not alone! My bf and i adopted a rescue dog several months ago, and all my dreams of frollicking in parks have changed to a dream of someday having a dog that doesnt shake and quiver at every new thing. Thankfully, we dont have any poomergencies, but i have had geriatric pets before and know your woes. Thanks for sharing!
We also have a deaf and near-blind dog that has decided he MUST pee every 18 minutes. Add the fact that we live in Fairbanks, Alaska and you’ll understand why I am counting down the days until his doggie-demise. Hercules (also named after a Disney character) is a 15-year-old Jack Russell Terrier and he’s been a family member since he was a puppy. A family member that I want to cuddle and shoot simultaneously. When he finally kicks the bucket I will bury him in the garden, plant tulips on his grave and relish the smell of a pet free home
Oh man, I feel you so bad on this one. I have two cats that take poo-cues from eachother. I will say, however, that the elderly one has done better since we got our kitten (who came with litterbox software installed), and moving away from an apartment complex that used pesticides all too regularly. Even so, I pick up poop a LOT and clean our original 60 year old hardwood floors on hand and knee all the time. You and me bud. We are poo buddies.
DOGGY DIAPERS! They really work, or at least they’ll be better than diarrhea everywhere. http://www.amazon.com/Simple-Solution-Washable-Diapers-Large/dp/B0009YUDTU/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1326566077&sr=8-3. And, yeah: baby gates at night, although it sounds like Jackson can overcome the barricades. Never mind. SHUCK the baby gates.
I know you’re not a Tool Guy, but I’d enlist a Helpful Friend to install permanent half doors barricading off the kitchen that you could CLOSE at night. Jackson couldn’t leap over those. Or could you crate the dogs at night? Then at least you could drag them outside and hose them off in the morning.
maybe a nest with straw outside and keep her out there most of the time..sounds cruel but maybe she misses the mess that was her life..
Don’t like the message of this post, or moreso what people are taking away from it. “I will never get a dog” etc. “I’m swearing off dogs for life” “keep the dog in the barn… like what she is used to!” – total bullshit – not a good message. Even remotely implying that once an animal gets old or needs medical help, to abandon it? To swear off pets? That’s what people are taking away from this if the comments are any indication. It’s obvious if both dogs have the same problem it’s likely something they are BOTH eating. It’s called going to the vet. Think before you put this stuff out there – you’re sending the wrong message. The person who said Dory should live in the barn should be absolutely ashamed of themselves – brainless, heartless statement.
The message of the post was one of jest. It was a short-lived issue and I’m happy to report that zero accidents have come since.
I wouldn’t worry too much about the comments. They don’t influence how we treat ‘em and they’re well cared for, loved, and entrenched as ‘indoor’ dogs.
Ease up on the anger, Gary. We know how to take care of pets and the vet said to keep doing what we were doing. We did, and the problem corrected itself.
I’m not going to sit here and debate whether or not I should post something just in case someone, somewhere is going to eventually possibly take it the wrong way. I get your point, but I think you’re taking my post to a level it doesn’t deserve to be.
Oh, and as far as swearing off dogs forever? Yesterday’s post should offer up even more proof that I wasn’t being serious.
I know it wasn’t your intent. But I find it absolutely upsetting (some) people are responding so casually about life. “it sounds cruel, but…” that’s because it is cruel. And I’ll just leave it there.
Just found your site tonight from the blogess, and this post earned the bookmark! You understand my daily hell of being an animal lover! I am a freak with 5 dogs and 1 cat. 4 of the dogs are ankle biters and refuse to learn any type of housetraining, and the 5th is a 17 year old aussie mix that has become incontinent in both the bladder and bowel. I go through paper towel and pine sol like no other! I have had friends and family tell me to “get rid” or “put down” one or all of them, but that is not an option. They are my pets, my babies, my family. I rescued them from one bad situation or another, I am not about to abandon them over this. But I have also hoped for a fart! Sometimes I have even gotten lucky and found that is all it was!
Great post, and I feel your pain. My rescued adult dog doesn’t do much of anything indoors anymore, thank goodness! When I moved from the first place I had her, we had to replace the carpeting in one room from her pee. But my geriatric kitty with the failing kidneys has done everything from poop outside the box somewhat regularly, to puke on every carpet and rug in the place, to soaking my entire comforter and bed with pee (not his fault, the door to his litter box was closed). Now I feel not so alone with all the messes I regularly clean up.
I get that, but understand that much of what you read is tongue-in-cheek. This is a humor blog and kind of off-the-wall most times. As such, it attracts readers who are a lot like myself, which I cherish.
When I hear someone say in jest, “Oh man, I’m gonna kill you!”, I don’t phone the cops about an imminent murder. It’s a joke. Much like some of the comments. When someone wrote that they were counting the days until the doggy-demise, believe me, it’s levity in a stressful situation. If they really wanted the dog dead, it’d be a syringe away.
This isn’t some serious pet forum so I wouldn’t get too riled up about what you’ve read in the post or the comments. It just has a different vibe than I think you’re perceiving. Good peeps read this blog and I won’t publish comments that personally attack anyone.
I do understand your frustration and your point, I just think there are actual pet abusers out there who better deserve the attention.
When we’re talking about lives of animals, it’s never a joke. There are upsetting comments in this thread. I don’t see how “counting the days until (the dog) dies” is humorous. Sorry but I just don’t see it. And where is the humor in saying to tie the dog outside “to what they’re used to” – the problem is that people think of pets as disposable. They find a way to validate bad behavior by hearing what they want to hear from others. It is especially disheartening that you would try to break this cycle of abuse by taking this dog in the first place, and still some people here don’t seem to “get it” – I’ve been watching this blog for a few years now and this is only the 3rd time I’ve posted, so don’t paint the picture of some deranged “anger ridden” individual when I think I have a very good point. Some of these people SHOULD be ashamed of themselves for even suggesting these things. I stand by what I said.
I don’t think I painted you as deranged. I totally understood your point. I just won’t publish comments that are personal attacks because it’s not the place for it.
Regardless of others’ comments, it doesn’t affect what we do here and I certainly think we do our part to break the cycle you speak of. Already we’ve been reached out to for more information on adoption. If one dog gets adopted as a result, we win!
I appreciate your passion, I really do, I’m just saying that I wouldn’t get too angry over what you read to the point where you’re seething and taking it out on people here. It’s supposed to be a happy place.
It’s all good. I get it. And I appreciate your stance.